- At March 23, 2006
- By Jeannine Gailey
- In Blog
9
Saw Adrienne Rich read last night with Seattle Arts and Lectures. I had seen her really burn it up two years ago at the ASU Writers Conference, so I was surprised to see her so frail at this reading, a little more subdued. I heard she’s sick. But I still hope to have such a kickass reading voice when I am her age. The work she read was less political than usual too, more subtle and poetic, although she had a great line in one poem echoing the “You Go to War with the Army You Have Line,” describing patients at a war amputee hospital, “You come back from war/ with the body you have.” A lot of people said after the reading that they liked it a lot more than they expected.
I’ve been a literal nervous wreck over the book, not sleeping well at night, shoulders in crunchy knots, worrying. I am excited about the book, but the process is more stressful than I foresaw when I was dreaming about it last year. I think I will feel better when the printed books are on my doorstep. Hopefully 🙂
I still have a bunch of work piled up on my desk I haven’t gotten too yet, but here’s what I’m wondering – everyone else (okay, at least Mary and Jeff) has gotten their contributor’s copy of Eleventh Muse, where’s mine? I hope it’s in the mail today, I could use the pick me up – two weeks and the only poetry mail has been a lone rejection from Poetry Northwest. I did get a small check from my contribution to this month’s “Favorites” March/April issue of Northwest Palate (it has my pictures of Skagit Valley’s tulip festival and Bainbridge Island’s boat dock, as well as little descriptions of both locales.)
Have been struggling with two versions of a poem – one is free verse, the other is semi-rhyme-y. I’m going to post them so vote on which one you like better. Then I’ll take them down because I don’t like poems hanging out on the blog – vote now, just like American Idol, and you can make one of them disappear!
(Poems deleted…)
Esther's Writing Works
Jeannine
I’m going to print these out, but on quick reading I like the second. Thanks for the info on Rich. Esther
Anonymous
Hi Jeannine
I think the rhymed poem has lines that are compressed and tighter, which allows the ending to be that much more of a release.
Thanks for sharing.
Carol
Penultimatina
I didn’t get mine yet Jeannine…I’ve just been mooning over the website. Can’t wait to get that copy, though. So glad my poem will be hanging out with yours! 🙂
Anne
I am surprised by this, but I like the rhyme-y one better, I think. Although I kind of like the ending better on the first one — I’m not sure why.
Envious that you got to see Rich! She has been *so* important to me ever since I started reading her, around 1980 or so when I was an undergrad, and I’ve never actually managed to see her, and I’m afraid I may not get to.
Steven D. Schroeder
Hee hee. Jeffery got his already because he lives about an hour and a half away from me. Y’all’s went out Tuesday or yesterday, I think, so they should get to you soon.
David Vincenti
Gee, I hate to come late and bring dissent, but I think the phrases have better flow in the first one. I think the semirhymy one has a couple of abrupt points driven by stanza shape. Since I’m usually more interested in the way the words hit the ear, I find that less appealing. However….
The structre of the first one and the repetion of “nettles” and “shirts” made me think it wants to be a sestina if any form at all. That would be a larger one, but an interesting rewrite.
Don’t you hate it when people completely reinterpret your question? Sorry about that.
Ivy
Hey Jeannine, I preferred the first one but it could do with a bit more tightening — sometimes the sense was ambiguous, e.g.
My father made a casket for each son
in case his only daughter
survived all her brothers
I might inherit the kingdom
My brothers were cursed
I could not speak a word and then
I thought some punctuation after ‘brothers’ would be good, either a full stop or an em dash, or something like that, otherwise the enjambement caused it to lose sense for me.
And also, didn’t she sew the seven shirts, but the seventh shirt was missing a sleeve, so that one brother had a swan wing? I think that might be an interesting detail to incorporate. Or not. 😉
Hope that helps.
Charles
Wow, you were here at the ASU Conference that year?? I introduced Adrienne at that reading. It was one of the greatest moments of my MFA experience here. 🙂
Crazy that we’ve crossed paths again!
jeannine
Thanks Esther, Carol, Anne, Ivy and David for your comments – very helpful!
Mary and Steve – I can’t wait!
Charles – yes, I remember! That was a really fun conference! I’m so bummed I missed my hero AS Byatt there last year…